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Divorce Toasts

To alimony-the high cost of loving.

To alimony-man's best proof that you have to pay for your mistakes.

To divorce-the screwing you get for the screwing you got.

Here's to the divorcee with balls--she believes alimony should be a guaranteed annual wage.

Tis better to have loved and lost
Than to marry and be bossed.

To Zsa Zsa Gabor, who said, "I never hated a man enough to give him his diamond back."

Here's to the high rate of divorce, which Morton Hunt said "reflects not so much the failure of love as the determination of people not to live without it."